“And it came to pass that they formed a secret combination, even as they of old; which combination is most abominable and wicked above all, in the sight of God;” (Book of Mormon, Ether 8:18)
“You don’t have to put up with Maxx. I can’t stand him either. He thinks he controls everyone in the department.” Rabbit sat with Grumpy at midnight chow as the two of them seethed about Maxx. “He came and told me that I’m going to be at the top of his cut list because of my reputation on the internet. He’s nothing but an a__hole.” The discussion heated even more each time one of them spoke. It was open season on Maxx and there were no limits to what they were saying about him. They had even ceased speaking in low tones and now the soldiers sitting at the next table were listening to the venomous words. “I don’t think you could find anyone in the department who even likes that a__hole.” Rabbit’s wheels were turning. He’d begun to recognize an opportunity and now he was going to turn it to his advantage. “I’ll bet you could get everyone in the department to sign a statement against Maxx. If H. R. had a stack of statements on their desk they wouldn’t keep that bastard around for a minute.”
A new phase of the plot was hatching. Grumpy could save himself if he could recruit the other Americans. It could work. “There’s only one guy who wouldn’t go along with this. Jed and Maxx are friends. I don’t think we could get Jed to go along with it.” Rabbit was an expert manipulator and he could artfully stay ahead of the jackals just long enough to get to his hole in the ground. “You don’t need Jed. If you could get statements from everyone else, Jed by himself wouldn’t be able to save Maxx.”
“Let’s get together with Lumpy and Bling tomorrow night and talk this thing over. I’ll bet we could overthrow this S. O. B. Whatever you do, though, don’t say anything to Jed about it or this whole thing will blow up in our faces.”
By morning the idea had blossomed in Grumpy’s mind until he began to feel a little more confident. He stood through the shift change monitoring his watch and waiting for his first opportunity to capture Lumpy and Bling together. After the shift change I pulled up all of the important items for the daily report and told Aslam that I’d be going to breakfast. It was the moment that Grumpy had waited for. He gathered Lumpy and Bling together and asked them to meet with him at the DFAC in the evening.
The day passed as usual. It was getting hot on the base, reaching 106 degrees in the afternoon, and there was no air conditioning in most of the trucks. The wind had blown for two days, kicking up dust and making the heat even more unbearable. The drivers were hot and tired by the time they came in that evening and they were anxious to go home. The shift change went by and I signed my time sheet and left for the evening. I never went to dinner at the dining facility because the food was rich and heavy and it never settled well on my stomach just before bed time. It was a good opportunity for the conspirators to gather.
“If we all sign statements that Maxx has been abusive and intimidating we can get him thrown out as supervisor.” Grumpy had started the discussion. “Lumpy, you don’t like Maxx. What can you say about him in a statement?” “Uh, I don’t know. I don’t like Maxx but I don’t know if I have anything that I can put in a statement. I gotta think about dat one.” Lumpy felt a bit uneasy about the meeting, but he didn’t want to be the one to say anything. He wasn’t a real leader and it surprised nearly everyone that he’d ever been promoted to a foreman’s position.
“Look, you guys, we all need to stand together to get this thing done. We can get rid of that big S. O. B. if we just send in our statements together. We don’t have to put up with him any more. This is our chance to get him good.” The white rabbit poked his head out of his hole long enough to add a few words. Bling chimed in, “That bastard told me that I couldn’t get paid for the extra time that I put in here. He wants me to work for free. I ain’t goin’ along wid dat. I’ll sign a statement. Let’s get that bastard good!” Grumpy grinned when he heard Bling join in, but the voice in his head didn’t go away. “You’re a dead man! You’d better pull this off! You’re a dead man!” Grumpy continued, “I printed some blank statements for us. You guys fill them out and sign them and I’ll turn them in tomorrow morning. Whatever you do, though, don’t say anything to Jed about this or it could kill the whole scheme.” He passed out the blank statement forms to each of the conspirators. “Give them to me in the morning,” he concluded.
Rabbit talked to Scalawag at the morning shift change in the Fuel Department. “I don’t think I need to add my statement. Yours will be enough.” Scalawag was playing his normal political game—stay in the middle and don’t get caught on either side. It was a game that had served him well for a long time, but he was never a person of real conviction. No one trusted him because no one ever knew what he stood for.
As the morning shift change concluded I sat at the computer, gathering the information together for the daily report when Lumpy walked into the office. “I ain’t getting’ into dem discussions at de Dee-fack at night. Uh-uh. Dey ain’t talkin’ ‘bout nothin’ good down dere. I ain’t even gettin’ involved. It’s some bad stuff dat dey’re talkin’ ‘bout. I don’t even want to be around it. Uh-uh. Dat Rabbit likes to talk ‘bout some bad stuff.” The words spilled out of his mouth just as they normally did. He hardly ever gave any thought to what spilled out. I stared at him, trying to understand the meaning behind what he was mumbling. “What’s Rabbit saying?” I asked the question, but I was fearful that the answer was going to go on for the next half hour. “He’s sayin’ some bad stuff. I don’t even want to be a part of it. Uh-uh.” He walked out of the office and I breathed a sigh of relief that the conversation with him was over, but I wondered what kinds of things Rabbit was talking about at the DFAC in the evenings.
Grumpy came into the office, signed his time sheet to end his night shift and walked out again. He held a small stack of papers in his hand as he headed across the gravel parking area toward the Human Resources office.
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